A Survivor’s Guide to Staying Safe on Facebook

Important!

Deliberate Donkey

Just go offline is a ridiculous thing to tell a survivor of domestic violence. Isolation is a tactic of abusers, and suggesting that a victim or survivor continue that, or further that, is condoning a strategy abusers use to maintain their control over their target. It’s been my experience that going online is empowering and supportive, and an important part of the recovery and reconnection process.

But it’s dangerous. Abusers are fucking assholes. Mine found me while I was still completely anonymous, using a pseudonym not even remotely connected with my identity or location, which prompted me to change my author identity from Tending Weeds to Melanie. I am Melanie. And fuck him for making me think I needed to be anyone else.

Abusers will lie, cheat, steal, manipulate, and coerce in order to get what they want, and there is nothing, nothing, that will stop them from…

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