Onward…one step at a time.
I think many victims of narcissistic abuse are high achievers and like I have pointed out before they are responsible, caring and hard working individuals; which makes it understandable that the narcissist was able to manipulate them into “trying harder” and thinking they could fix the relationship and the narcissist and were willing to put in the time and effort to do so. We have high expectations of ourselves and never want to give up and admit defeat, we tell ourselves that if we were a little more understanding, if we explained in a way the N could understand, maybe if we never had a bad mood or got angry, if we had no expectations of the N and accepted him as he is, or if we love him unconditionally enough he will reciprocate.
It makes sense that we would be hard on ourselves then, when we aren’t able to…
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